The CEO of UberCorp International was silent.
This did not bode well for the division heads in the call.
Silence meant unhappiness. Unhappiness meant judgement.
Cyber Khan was behind schedule.
“We are building to the original specifications that Engineering signed off on months ago,” said Production, desperately trying to pass the blame.
“Specs that did away with superfluous weight for better bipedal balance,” came Engineering’s reply, sticking to their guns as always.
“The tail saw is not superfluous!” barked Design, “It is an integral weapon system that was added to enhance the destructive properties of the entire package.”
Engineering snapped back, “Wasn’t this system originally designed as a protection unit? We all know that the tail saw has no anti-kaiju capabilities. It’ll only be useful in tearing down the city around it.”
“That’s not the only advantage we gain from keeping the original design,” piped up Marketing, “Small group research shows that the tail saw adds 18% to the design’s intimidation factors, and 27% to memorability.”
“It’s a 60 meter tall robotic dinosaur!” called out Engineering. “It’s already intimidating and memorable without a pointless ten meter chunk of spinning metal affixed to the tail!”
“The tail saw was part of the initial design specs,” came from Design.
“If you keep the tail saw, the jump jets’ fuel reserves will be enough for six jumps, tops. That’s not enough mobility to last an entire battle,” rebutted Engineering.
Operations spoke up, “This bickering isn’t helping us hit the market any sooner. We need a resolution today or our counter demonstration at the GUARD parade will feature nothing but the Carnitron drones.”
“This is the flagship product,” Marketing chimed in, “in the whole Monsterpocalypse Response Mech line. If we don’t make a splash in the news cycle then no municipalities will order their own copy of the system.”
“And we need to secure those sales,” added Finance, “since the whole company is riding on these MRMs.”
Engineering was outraged. “Are you seriously telling me that you want to increase collateral damage, decrease flight capability, and throw off the mech’s entire center of balance because it will ‘look cool’ and might increase sales?!?”
“Yes,” cut through the argument effortlessly.
Silence.
The CEO had spoken.
“The tail saw will be reintegrated into the tail unit. Engineering and Production will run double shifts to make up for the lost time.”
Finance coughed politely before speaking up, “That overtime will add billions to the development costs and we’re already strapped for capital as it is.”
“That’s immaterial.”
Silence descended again before the CEO continued.
“Let me make this perfectly clear to all of you. This product is not just a product. It is a completely new approach to this crisis. No one will be content to rely upon the whims of overstretched governments that might not respond to their pleas for help. Every city on earth will want their own MRM on standby. This system must be on time. Trillions of dollars are at stake. We can corner the market on the Monsterpocalypse and turn a profit from selling survival to a grateful populace. Now cease your bickering, do your jobs, and get Cyber Khan built, running, and combat ready before the deadline.”
After the chorus of affirmations and sign offs, the CEO of UCI smiled.
“After all, there’s money to be made.”
- Details
- Written by Jeff Mitchell
- Category: ÜberCorp International
- Hits: 3673